The following links provide relationship advice, suggestions, insights, and tools to help those effected by relationship challenges. Alana's answers are to questions from people in challenging and abusive relationships. We feel the information shared on conflict resolution may help shed some light on how a person may move towards more balance and peace while engaging in difficult relationships.
Through our work with Alana since 1992, we have been shown that the first step to healing is self-love. By giving ourselves love and compassion, we are then able to extend that same love to others. We are really all in this world together, and what we do to another, we are also doing to ourselves.
The following are seven questions submitted to Alana and her answers. When you click on the question, you will be taken to a page, where you can read the transcribed answer or listen to the answer in Real Audio format. When you get to the page, simply click the icon in order to listen:
My boyfriend and I have been having a lot of problems with our relationship. He has physically abused me twice in one month. He currently lives with me and I have asked him to leave. I want to know if I have made the right decision concerning this matter. (4 minutes, 29 seconds)
I have been in an emotionally abusive marriage for 25 years. I have tried to make it work, but after all this time I am giving up. Meanwhile I have met this wonderful young man who has helped me through all this. Because I haven't left yet, my friend will no longer talk with me. (6 minutes, 12 seconds)
I have a really difficult time with my parents. My Mum in particular. They are both alcoholics. I feel as though I am lecturing her all the time. How can I stop being so abusive to her even though I am so angry? (3 minutes, 46 seconds)
What is the best way to handle the increasing rudeness, aggressiveness in the name of assertiveness, putdowns and plays for power in our society? I realize that we are mirrors of our surroundings and relationships and I have tried to increase my own feelings of self-worth. Please advise what else I can do. (4 minutes, 9 seconds)
I have been married to my husband for 11 years, for 6 of them he was abusive. When I was ready to walk out, he told me he had a problem and needed help. My heart was already in the hands of another man. I thought he really loved me...Why won't my subconscious let go of something that was so destructive to me? (5 minutes, 37 seconds)
How can I learn to deal with my anger and hatred towards my parents and be peaceful and happy? I really need this help because the anger is sometimes all-consuming. (4 minutes, 41 seconds)
We also want to point you to a free downloadable ebook that is a true story about a young woman, who after a troubled childhood, finds herself pregnant and alone. It shares a story about how a woman deals with abuse and finally finds peace. The author wrote it to help people who are suffering from severe trama, so feel free to share the free ebook with those you feel it may benefit.