Finding a Soul Mate Series: What If I Don't Respect My Partner's Behavior

Questioner: You know Alana, I imagine there are some viewers who would read what you shared in the previous question on spiritual marriage, and they would say, "Okay, that sounds really great. I want to respect my partner. I think this person might actually be my soul mate but how do I respect behavior that I don't respect? We're a partnership here, we're a team here, and I feel like I'm doing my part by expressing and communicating. But how do I respect the behaviors, the values of somebody when I don't really respect their actions? I don't like it. I want them to change, to be honest."

Alana: That you for bringing this up. Of course, people do have differences, and just because they are in a spiritual union it does not mean things are always easy and effortless. In situations as this it is up to the two parties who are co-creating together to communicate. So if you are the one who has the perspective that you shared, then the best action is to also go into your partner's nature and recognize what their deeper intention is. Why is their behavior the way that it is? Is it that they intend to create connection? Is it that they intend to have love? Is it that they intend to heal something? In other words, if you go into their core intention, you will be able to find truth. Actions that are discordant are most often about healing. It most always is about finding love. Love then becomes the common ground.

Questioner: So Alana, you are saying when a person can get beyond the actions and see the deeper motivation that becomes the greater truth, it becomes easier to have compassion and understanding.

Alana: Exactly. And having understanding and compassion does not mean you have to agree. But finding the deeper intention creates a common ground and by aligning in love and sharing and communicating one's personal values without blame and judgment is much easier and creates a foundation for growth in the relationship.

< previous next >