Question: I was in a lot of despair and I laid down in bed on my back and put my arms around me and said " I love you unconditionally over and over again. I gently rocked myself from side to side. I awoke the next morning with an ecstatic wonderful loving feeling resonating from my chest. I felt a warm, glowing, radiant, vibrating loving feeling in my heart and heard the word "love, love, love" echoing and resonating in my mind's ear in a voice that was not my own and yet it was. Two voices were resonating as one. All my despair had melted away. I have tried may ways to re-create this experience and accepted that it is just a sign post along the way. If I can create and /or co-create this altered state--how and how often?
Answer: Thank you for your question. Often in life, we have experiences that put us in a place of despair. They may bring forth, a time where we perhaps, have great expectancy that is not fulfilled in the way we desire to have it fulfilled. What this can do is tap a vast reservoir of feeling within us. This may bring forth much despair or pain. When we are in a state like you describe we are very vulnerable, and in a delightful way as well to experience a transformation. We may experience messengers that come through us and through our hearts. What is a greater expression of love than the expression than can come through our hearts?
Dear one what you have experienced here is what Alana might call a slingshot that appeared as an altered state. You went from one depth and moved through to the other side in the way of a heightened experience of who you really are. Therefore, what you have here is an awareness of the contrast of the same desire for love. If you have great lack then what must also exist is great joy. You have gotten to see the other side of the coin.
The reason, perhaps, that you have not re-experienced this may be that your mind is very strong. Therefore, your mind may have considerations or may have thoughts about the way this experience should occur. That is one possibility. Another possibility is that your nature has not felt the same depth of despair. Therefore a slingshot has not occurred in the same way. I also sense that your being is not one that will reproduce in the same way. For you it must happen in a flicker of a instant when you are out of your mind in a delightful way. In this way, you are vulnerable to your guides, angels, and vaster self in a wonderful way. Your heart is fully open. Practice in your meditations holding your heart open with no expectancy, what so ever, except to know that by having your heart open, you are allowing resources of a grander nature to come through you. In delight see what shows up.
Through this allowing, you may find that you have some great experiences in different ways that may be as beneficial. When you quit looking I bet you find this incredible passion moving through you in a way that will be similar.
Thank you for your question dear one.